Rien d'especial.. relax, kick back & feel at ease *^_^*



But I Still Haven't Decided...

I honestly didn't want to leave, the fact that almost everybody I know either left or is getting ready to still never changed my mind, even though my place was pretty far from where the bombing was, you could still hear it & see the Israeli ships covering the beautiful sea view, they're really only survey ships, harmless friendly ones, beautiful too might I add, at night with their lights on & all, they really were beautiful "I took pictures, you'll know why I couldn't post them"
I helped my Saudi friends, felt like a responsible elder sister who had to make sure they get to safety first, I was relieved when they got out, I left my place & moved downtown with other friends who were only there to visit, talk about bad timing huh? .. now the reason why I finally "decided" to leave was mom who wouldn't stop crying, specially after the unfortunate event..

May they all rest in peace.., that's what made me consider coming back home like a week after the war started, my mom, she actually had a map infront of her & everynow & then she'd call to make sure we're fine as the name mentioned in the news is close to where I live, she'd freak out if the connection was dead, it looked close in the map but it wasn't really that close in reality..

I thought alot about my friends, one of my friend's elder brother left on the first day, he was just heading north & when he heard the news he just continued his way, & got out, funny really, he just called and said "my heart is with you guys" & POOPH! was gone. my other friend decided to leave when we visited the embassy location, sudden but sure decision. my last friend couldn't leave because his uncle was trapped in the south with his family & of course he wouldn't go back home without him, there was also this other guy *a known comedian* with his family also, who couldn't leave because his wife's passport was in the south, such a mess! I was packed and all but I wasn't sure I wanted to go through an uncertain trip all by myself, actually I wasn't sure I wanted to go through it at all!

My friend suggested we visit the north where the embassy located a departing point for us, & on our way up the magnificent mountain, you can see smoke rising from places that's been bombed, totally ruining the spirit of the valley, it's upsetting to think that it just happened, kids & innocent people were getting hurt at that very moment.. unbearable.

We got in.. sad vibes took all over that area, everyone looked lost, some people were inline trying to get their names signed to hop into next bus leaving, others were hooked into the screen wishing someone will now say it's over & things shall be back to normal in no time (me for example) others were on the phone assuring their loved ones that it's all okay & safe where we were.. weird feeling.. couldn't identify, the uncertainty, the indecision, the improbability, little fear.. even anoxia! we couldn't decide, we knew we didn't want leave then, so we went back downtown.
My dear uncle his wife the dearest were there too, up north where it was far & safe, here's how it went:

Me: Hi khaloo! how long have you guys been here!

Khalo: about a month, you're still here?

Me: am not sure I want to leave, are you guys going?

Khalo's wife: : I don't think we need to.. the embassy says we're safe here but I don't think it's too safe in your area now, if you don't want to leave come stay with us.
Me: I have my friends here we're staying together, if it gets ugly I'll give you a call.

Khalo's wife: okay honey, stay safe, love you.

Me: Love you more..

That night, right after that call, was when the Israelis started bombing different routes to Syria, now next morning:

Khalo's wife: Sponts, we're leaving, the embassy called and said get out now it's going to get ugly.. the bus leaves in 2 hours be there, your mom will kill us if we showed up without you.

Sponts:..... .... .... aaaa... ... I'll ... call you in 10 mins.

Now.. I remember exactly how I felt, not pretty, confused, lost, again with all the uncertainty & the anoxia & yada yada yada .. I wanted to stay with my friends who are waiting for their uncle, and I know what mom was going through.. but can I really leave my friends!? aaah darn hesitation & me!

Me: You know what you guys? am staying.. I still have more stuff to pack up in my place anyways (excuse!)

My Friend: You should go, it'll make us feel better, we'll have less people to worry about.

Me: That's mean! (emotional issues)

While they were talking me into it they were already sending my bags downstairs & into the car.. me looking all lost .. still haven't decided!

We hit the road to the departing point (which by the way is an hour away) as they're still going on & on about how I'll finally be safe in a matter of hours when all am doing is nodding.. looking all lost & thinking.. but I haven't decided!
I call my friends who had to stay for their country, they're happy that am leaving, not me, I want one of them to say "Come Back!" I so would have..

I get in the embassy, see my uncle and his wife.. aaah what joy, what relief, I felt safe! I felt home already just seeing them, that was a hug I really needed! but.. I still haven't decided..

My uncle tried to talk my friends into leaving with us as well, they had the perfect excuse.. they have decided to stay, I made my friend & his uncle promise to take me for a ceaser salad when they get home, we say goodbye, we hug, still looking all lost, I get in the bus, the ambassador comes in to wish us a safe trip.. you can totally read in his eyes he meant it, we move.. I cry.. not knowing why.. but I did know this.. I still haven't decided.

To Be Contunied..


Happy Birthday Lalooda..

Miss you gazillion...




Samboosa el amoora tagged me, I don't usually go for tags but I thought this one should be fun.. check me out.. it really does look like Me!

oh and guess who fixes my computer when it gets messed up!

Naah I wish, would be fun to have pets in the office if you asked me, don't you think?

Regardless, the dude who does come to fix our computer in my company does share cuteness!! it's so weird but I think I have a crush on our computer.. fixing.. dude! it's fun to have a crush on someone I miss this feeling, I know he likes me too cause I just know,.. yes he does! .. yes he does!! shut up I know what am saying.. he's really cute! like in an adorable kinda way, that's usually not my type! you should see my face when I hear him walking in the company, I'd have a huge satisfied smile on my face for no reason plus a tickley feeling that I can't quite specify, and when he walks in my office I pretend like am busy with something and didn't even notice him walk in then go "Oh Hi you!" LOL ..am like that most of the time ..

am actually hearing him now talking to the secretary about his home town... aaah such a cute smile... LOL I can't believe me!

wait is she flirting with him!? that cow! oh well I'm not like going to do anything about it anyways as I don't mess around with boys at work, *e7imDARNe7im* so I'll enjoy the feeling till it goes away I guess..

crap! I better hurry up and post this then post something else before anyone could read it! yalla Bye!



Pillow Talk...

I can't seem to find the right pillow! I could swear I had one when I was a kid that never gave me nightmares nor did I ever wake up with such sore neck.. I just can't recall what it looked or felt like.. I have been looking for a pillow for such a long time now and I'm tired of looking, no matter what I get I always end up with so much pain around my neck and shoulder that no massage session can fix... I want my happy sleep.

am I the only one with this problem?!



Trick Or Treat...



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